How I Took My Parents to the Children's Museum

 Hey, guys, I haven't popped in for a while...It's time I put on some clothes and told a story...

...so I get off the car on my dad’s shoulders and my eyes couldn’t believe it!

Children’s Museum!

WTF??!?!!...I say to myself…and I hear my dad uttering: You better enjoy this, Sami, cause your mother and I aren’t here for OUR pleasure, but for yours!

Are you kidding me? Of course I’m gonna enjoy this! First of all, I don’t have to pay, cause my dad has this plastic thing, called a “credit card”, that works just like  mgic, and second of all, him and mom are the ones stamped to get in, while I just walk in like I’m going home to pull on Buddah's ears and eyes!

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Oooh, I’d been waiting for this for a long time! It was an entire building, where those parents of mine weren't allowed to say “NO!”, while pointing an ominous finger at me! It’s the building of “Yes!”. I got to throw balls, make a mess, touch everything, pull on cables, ride on an ELEVATOR! (I know - too much adrenaline there!) and throw a quarter down a circle, where I was supposed to watch it disappear into a hole, had it not been for my dad, jumping to save it, cause “we can’t waste money”. Heheh, how naïve IS this guy!

But, anyway, that place is the first good idea since breast milk! I mean, I got to meet lots of chicks and hang out with them, even though they were much too old for me! I mean one of them even tried to hold my hand?!?! Helloooo? You ever heard of age inappropriate relationships? You’re like five and I’m like 16-months old, and stuff, don’t be trying to hit on me with that awesome ball you’re playing with!'Cos, you know my mom will kick your mom's ass! Man! What’s up with girls these days?!

That one place, where my dad stuck me... was pretty scary, so I cried...it was like a chamber of wind! I kid you not! He came in with me and his lips were almost torn away from his teeth! That’s how strong the wind was inside that thing! And you call this fun? I only call it fun if that girl with the skirt went in there, so the wind blew her skirt up and I could see her brown diapers! Now that’d be fun! But being stuck with dad in that hairstyle messying machine…no, thank you! So…I cried till dad finally took me out!

Also, forgive me, parents, but I have to mention this: What’s up with you, people? You said you wouldn’t be having fun in this place? You played more with the toys than I did! My crazy mom was jumping like a wabbit on that game, where you need to lose calories or something, and dad was making all those funny poses, trying to act as a goalie in that virtual reality game! Not to mention how long you guys played with the other parents, trying to make huge and BORING soap balloons! Well, let me tell you something, guys! Soap balloons are OUT! Tubes, that blow air and have balls floating above them are IN! Can you even imagine how long it took me to take you away from those soap balloon stations? It was ridiculous! You guys act like kids! I wish you’d stop it and finally grow up, cause I’m getting cranky!

It’s not my fault, that YOU two decided to have three beers AT LUNCH today BEFORE taking me to the fun place (I don’t care if it’s St. Patrick’s day, it was lunchtime! And you know how important it is for you to have coffee after that, and you knew I had nowhere to get it to you from!). Anyway… it took me a while to take you back to the FUN elevator ride, where all I wanted to do was sound the emergency alarm! And WHY didn’t you let me?! It was the closest button to the ground, closest to me, so I needed to push it! You told me this was the place of no “No!”s! Then why the hell did you stop me from sounding my emergency alarm?!

That’s it! You guys are punished! Next time I’m not taking you to the Children’s Museum! You should have listened to me!

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I might take mom, cause she played with me with that fun Lego, but I'm afraid this would be way too much fun for dad, so he'd better go to work or get back to writing on his blog before I grow up and it's too late!