6am...

I just wanna sleep one night without being woken up at 5-30 or 6am! I have never once had a full and calm night's sleep for almost 5 years. And sometimes the attitude is just what could make me blow up:

Keys to The Doors

a poem I enjoyed..

I loved your eye of wonder: your third and fourth and fifth years spent astonished,
widening your eyes at each new trick of the world - 
and me standing there,
solemnly explaining how it was done.
The moon, the stars, the rainbows, 
photographs, gravity, the birds in the air,
the difference between blood and water.

In true life? you would say, looking up
and I would nod, like some broken-hearted sage,
knowing there would be no answers soon
to all the big questions that were left,
to cruelty and fear,
to age and grief and death,
and no words either.
And you, like me, will sit and shake your head.
In true life? 
Yes, my sweet, strong one, I'm afraid there is all this as well,
and this is it: true life.


by Robin Robertson

Buddies

Parenthood. Never what I expected. So much more difficult than I thought. And now - so much better than it was. These past few weeks I can feel a new fun era of fatherhood emerging. Sami is now a person with opinions, likes, dislikes, and even a stance on some serious issues such as the dinosaurs still live and some train-tracks near our home in Brisbane no longer in use, are in fact millions of years old.

He is at the stage where he wants to do everything himself - make his breakfast, pour his water, bring me another beer from the fridge, massage mommy, drill holes, tie screws, vacuum the house...It's overwhelming of course and difficult as hell as A and I both know he'll drop, spill, mess up, and break things. But we try to bite our tongues and let him be...as much as we can before he fills his sleeve with water when pouring himself a glass.

The most amazing part of it all is the communication - in a funny Englo-Bulgarian we raves about dinosaurs, about "The Night at the Museum", about fossils, sea creatures and not eating animals. Ever! He cannot comprehend how people slaughter a cute little creature and put it on their plates. We never forced him to be vegetarian, on the contrary - offered him meat so he could choose. But we did explain where it came from, so Sami won't grow in the denial and oblivion most others do thinking that there is no connection between the life, the slaughterhouse and their plates.

Our games are so much more fun these days that fatherhood really grows on me. Oh of course, I still need a glass or four of wine at the end of the day, to strip off the wHining but at least I am now more tired than flustered.

When we were on our little campervan trip around the beaches of North Queensland, we set up a little surprise for him - fossil digging at the beach. And that made his trip! He was mesmerized! And the friendship grew even stronger...

So to those of you, tired, frustrated and confused by parenting, hiding behind masks, so they can meet social expectations of being perfect moms and dads, I can gladly say - it will be fun! And that fun may last for a very short time before you get rejected by your teenager. So, embrace it and leave facebook for the moments when you REALLY will have no chance to roll little cars down the cabinet or play with dolls. Live in the now!

Father's day

For father's day I had amazing presents from my loved ones!

My dear alkA wrote me this:

'All I would want to say is that you amaze me with the greatest devotion, the nonchalant and easy-going fathering you are providing for Sami. Keep dropping him when on the slides, this only comes to show that you are always there with him! Keep forgetting to feed him dinner on time, only because you are playing a game with him and you two are so totally lost in the moment, that my heart just melts (and my ovaries just go into somersaults)! Keep bringing him home with his brand-new pair of jeans ripped open and a bruised forehead, after skateboarding in the park for hours! His proud smile says it all…'

and those words mean the world to me! I never really thought I was doing too well as a dad. Now I know I must be doing something right :)

And my Sami gave me the biggest hug and the best happiness smiles! Here is my Monchichi of Happiness:

Заповядайте на куклен театър!

Представленията се играят всеки ден от сутрин до...изчерпване търпението на зрителите. В такъв случай обикновено актьорите биват осакатявани, като им се отлепват важни органи, след което - безпощадно обути и настъпвани до края на деня!

 

ПС: Нито един жив актьор не беше наранен при правенето на този театър. Всяка прилика с реални лица е случайна и непреднамерена. 

Restauranting

It's one of Sami's favourite things ever! He gets to flirt with the waitresses and color things. And he doesn't really care about the food. He's happy as long as alkA and I have mercy to let him climb all over the chairs and tables. And we are always happy to have a minute to each-other, as long as we don't get dirty looks from the people around us.

And as I am writing this, I realize how lucky we are. It's sunny out and the three of us are out, dining on a Monday. Not working definitely has its benefits :). Cheers!

Oh, Poop!

Do you know the joke about the guy that went to substitute for his friend's doctor shift in the hospital one afternoon?

***

So,

The doctor walks out and leaves his friend, who has no idea about medicine to stay in his office.
He returns later that day and asks the friend how it went.

The friend says he saw three patients:

'1st one had constipation. So, I gave him laxatives.'
Doctor says - 'Good job! What happened?'

Friend says - 'He walked slowly at first and then started running'

'So, the second one had diarrhoea. I also gave him laxatives.'
Doctor says: 'What? You shouldn't have! What happened?'

Friend says - 'At first he started running, but then he started walking slowly'

:)

***

Even though there's another bit to the joke, I find this one appropriate as we experienced it tonight!

While playing, Sami said 'I gotta poop, I gotta poop!' and ran out the door. alkA chased him down towards the toilet and half way through the hallway he stopped running and simply calmed down...

I can't describe the mess...

How it took 1GBP to save three people from going insane

Sleep is NOT overrated! And those who tell me that they can jog and smile a whole day after having only a couple of hours of sleep should...get a kid!

In the past month Sami underwent an unbelievable transformation. From being the Christmas Monster who showered us with tantrums and whining most of the holiday season, he became the angel of joy, love and obedience in the new year. It's like we got our new year's gift right after dancing the old year away. It almost felt as if letting him dance with us on that night until he dropped, cured him of all insanity. But the new sigh of relief didn't exactly come without a price. The day tantrums were exchanged for night clingyness and midnight terrors - for us!

It all began with our natural desire to hug him in bed while he was going to sleep, as we so obsessed about our love for the new kid. He seemed to like it too and the reverse effect slapped us in the face like a slingshot. Soon we couldn't free ourselves from his night grip. The cries began as soon as we left the room and lasted for hours. 'Don't go, keep hugging me!' As soon as I found myself reaching out for the bottle with trembling hands, I realized that something was wrong again. So instead we went back digging for the earplugs again. As once more, it was time to Ferberize!

Of course, our hairs started loosing their color and our teeth started falling off again from grinding, I could collect berries in the bags under my eyes and the neighbors' kids were running away as soon as they saw my messy red-eyed face in the building. I was doing just fine. As in addition to the bedtime insanity, the midnight screams appeared. I swear, alkA timed it to exactly 2:12am every night. The first night we went terrified, to see what was happening to him, thinking he had fallen off the bed. But as it turned out, he wanted a banana!

And then, my dear wife had a brilliant idea again, as she in her creativity has been unsurpassed in my opinion. 'Let's see what happens if we leave the light on in the hallway'. And there it was: the light switch became connected through some sort of a WiFi connection to Sami's brain, as by switching it on, the crying stopped. If we only dares switch it off, there it began again. But better yet, with our endless attempts to be as green as possible, we found a nightlight today at the Pound shop! And Sami got his chance to show creativity and customize it with his favorite stickers! Voila! Now it's quiet and I can think again. He is staring with love into his mesmerizing little light on the wall and dreaming the night away with his favorite cars.

And we can finally rest...! Good night!

Demigods

There is so much beauty in the omnipotence! In the few short years when kids think that Mom and Dad are some mystical Gods and assign all power, knowledge and capabilities to them, parents can really reap the benefits of all the sleepless nights, junk-covered floors and broken gadgets. I experience this feeling every day now and can't help but believe a tiny speck in my own super-powers.

Broken toys? I fix them.
Hurt elbow? I kiss it.
Coughs and sneezes? Mom has just the right tools.
Bored? Dad has a bag full of foolish tricks to make Sami laugh.
Scared? Like from watching the horror movie Lord of the Rings for example? Mom will hug you and the monsters immediately become as timid as elves.

And so we breathe these minutes with full breaths, for we know that before we wake up, the little cuddly, curious, trusting, loving creature will be a relentless teenager, just like the ones we used to be.

Лафове

Много съм щастлив когато синът ми от 3-годишен ми казва "Тате, разбрахме ли се по мъжки!?"

Става леко тревожно, обаче, когато ми каже "Ах, мама му стара, пак се разглоби играчката ми!"

...знаех си аз, че трябва да се пляскам по-често през устата ама!

A Day in the Skatepark

If you were an Arab, or an Indian in Manchester, chances are you will find yourself in the Curry Mile in the morning. Despite my lack of desire to generalize, I would tell you that most likely you would give a very judgmental look to the father, who pushes the stroller of his 2-year-old son on a skateboard, flying towards the skatepark. But I'm used to these angry looks, staring at me as if I am breaking the law and fly by all the hookah-smoking critics of the Curry Mile for five minutes. For right after that is our little skate heaven. Every time the weather cheers up a notch, we try to go there.

Sami becomes more and more stable on the skateboard, as you may have noticed. So, now the next step is to introduce him to the half and quarter-pipes. And as a 10-year-old boy at the park told me, after asking me how old Sami was: 'Gotta start them while they're young!' (I laughed my ass off).

So, here are the first steps...rolls:

 

Already generating some interest in the ladies....not :)

The 2-year old skater!

Sami has learned so much to skateboard in the past 2-3 weeks, that it amazes me how a 2-year old can be so stable on the skateboard! I am not kidding, see for yourself! And I just can't wait for the day when he'll be teaching me tricks!