New-old Realities

6 Weeks of new and well-forgotten old realities, seeping in my soul to fill in the gaps that have been open for so long. Every past emptiness slowly fills back up again and the vessel shall be full once more.

Some of the old rivers have gone dry and the process is painful. The old "me" tries to show resistance to the demands of this new world, but thankfully there's so much inspiration around, that gives me the urge to keep going.

Walks

Walking around Manchester feels like fitness for the mind!
So much to see, to muse at, to experience, to question!
The amazing buildings, the green green parks, the vivid graffiti, the bars, pubs and coffee shops and the crazy-looking people.
These days once again for some reason I feel like an alien.
I wonder why people look at me, like I don't belong, like I'm not a good match for the beautiful girl I walk with...
aaah...I don't know. Must be my hair.

My Engine

As time progresses and the challenges of life seem ever more pushing, I can't help but come to the idea of "what am I doing?" and "what next?"
It's unfortunate that as carefree as I have always been, I now have to stand up to the true issues of life, which I have resisted for so long.
And yet, again, I am not scared. Am I foolish or just too confident? Or is there ONE and only ONE answer to this question: I am utterly fearless of what's to come, even excited about it! Because I have...

YOU!

I have the love of my life - MY FAMILY!

Remembering to be More...Amazed

The years seem to wash away the brightness of the colors of the simple things.
We tend to search for stronger thrills, for higher adrenalin, for more elaborate designs, and exotic places.
It's that cynicism, that blinds us for the simple things. And there's so much beauty in simplicity!

The ones, who, like my little alkA, gape "wooooooooooooow"-ing at the tiniest details of life, are truly blessed!

It takes me a while, but it's surely amazing to be more...AMAZED!


Here's to the simple things!

Letter to a Friend:

 

Dear friend,


I've been thinking about you. How are you doing lately?
I like our little conversations, even though I am terrible at writing back...I really missed you!
Every now and then, the time comes and here I am. I know, it's a shame that it took me from August to October to write again, but I promise to try and keep in touch more often.

...

Aaaah, we're in the UK! It feels great! The atmosphere of Manchester is so inspiring!
The air, almost always heavy with rain, nice and chilly weather, far, far away from the deserts of Nevada. This apparent gloominess gets swept away with the tiniest rays of the Sun. And they DO show up, from the most unexpected corners of the day, relentlessly looking for loopholes in the clouds, rushing to surprise us with the long shadows on the red brick walls...
and the buildings...

Everything is build hundreds of years ago, these magnificent edifices are covered in moss and poison ivy!
We stroll through the streets and constantly get lost in the secret passages, finding ourselves in the most bizarre places. So much art! In every detail, on every corner. Even the people are art...
There are so many students here, that it feels like that's all the whole town is all about.
and the coffee shops...
cuddled secretly in niches, in the cracks of the buildings even. With barely enough room for a wooden table and two chairs, and a coffee/tea machine.
and the pubs...
people overflowing every place there is, where someone can drink! With their business suits, with their mohawks and skinny jeans, all of them drinking together. If you listen long enough, you may well hear them singing!

...
but I digress...

School started and it's HARD! At the age of 31, I don't find it particularly easy to unravel the hardened knots of my brain and have to use them again. My enthusiasm is there, but I get overwhelmed so easily.

Either way, it's for a good reason. Hopefully, like you say, we are now on the right path to self-fulfilment!
I love that expression - that life is a journey and not a destination! I keep reminding this to myself!
And as for now, this journey feels tremendous! I feel right where I want to be! And I LOVE it!

And Sami! Sami is also doing great! He's back in Bulgaria with the grandparents, at least until we get everything squared away here.
He's almost two and such a powerful and fascinating boy! There is so much LIFE in him! We'll go see him in a couple of weeks. But then again, we're on Skype every morning and afternoon, singing,
talking and playing... We miss him so much! He doesn't seem to care we're away and always has the biggest smile, melting our hearts away!

The summer in Bulgaria was so amazing! I'll have to write you a whole different letter about it!

As for now, I'll say "Good night" and, please, take care of yourself!

All the best!

Stoyan