New and Improved

If desire is the door to success then devotion is the key.

I have known this truth for a while as it is the natural continuation of something I read on alkA's wall (not facebook wall, but real brick wall) over thirteen years ago: 'You have to know what you want and that you want it!'

As you may have experienced yourself, or at least noticed about my own humble self is that finding out what the 'it' is, is one of the most difficult tasks we are faced with.

Seems like the haze of life never quite settles so you can confidently look inside yourself and state: 'This is it!'

I did find out one thing, however, and I am rushing to share it with you: I know that I am the biggest of all hedonist and egoist! And I found what brings me the most pleasure - GIVING! Ever notice a little butterfly inside of you going crazy, tickling your breath, playing with your imagination and making your mind race as you imagine how the others will react when you give them your gift, your creation,your advice, your self? Well, that's the best food for my ego. Imagining the response; tasting the joy; even predicting the impact.

So, lead by the highly egoistic drive to give, I am now awarded with the chance to do it. (well, the UK system kind of forced me into it, but wow, what a discovery!) I am now a voluntary worker at the Manchester Drug Services! An inspirational environment, showing substance users that there is a chance, guiding them and nurturing them along the way by providing the best support I have seen until now. The UK healthcare organization has actually come to the realization that body and soul are one. And that you can't cure one without healing the other. So, apart from the incredibly inspiring psychological support groups, a disturbed, scared and abandoned drug-addict can now experience the ultimate sensations of meditation, acupuncture,  hot stone massages, aroma-therapies and reiki. So spirituality has now officially become part of the cure. Particularly the wealth of the experiences of the self, here and now.

And I am right in the middle of it all. It is so exciting, I can't wait for my next shift! What kind of a feeling is that? I don't get paid but I gladly devote my time to it. I guess it reminds me of this blog. I spent the entire day today (shamefully even neglecting my family a bit) renovating, writing and enriching this blog even though I get paid nothing for it.

Unsurprisingly, the bottom line is the well-known cliche. The IT  is the thing that you'd gladly do even if you weren't getting paid to do it.

And I finally get it!